Sunday, September 13, 2009

Book Review: Eve: A Novel of the First Woman

Warning: May Contain Spoilers.

Eve: A Novel of the First Woman is just that. It is an expansion on the first few books of Genesis as narrated by Eve and her daughters. Eve's sons however, never act as narrators. I personally believe that this is an attempt on the author's part to maintain the overall feminine voice of the novel. Additionally, the story is told in a series of flashbacks, creating the impression that the reader is actively listening to the story rather than being a passive observer. (Later in the novel however, I did get the distinct feeling that Eve was narrating her view of the story to one of her daughters.)

The majority of the story takes place after Adam and Eve's expulsion from the Garden of Eden, and primarily the length of time leading up to Abel's murder by his brother Cain. At this point in time Eve and her family live alongside a society heavily based upon Akkadia and Babylon. This society provides most of the impetus for the conflict and plot development in the story. Eve's time in Eden is explored as well, mostly for some character development.

As for Eve herself, the author paints a sympathetic picture. Before the Fall, Eve is depicted as sensuous and beautiful. After the Fall she is no less so, but she becomes increasingly lonely and doubtful. Eve continues to have children as her relationship with Adam and her older children falter, for their unconditional affection. Eve wrestles with herself spiritually and is tempted by the neighbouring society's deities.

While the novel does grapple with some thorny theological questions, they appear to be either ignored or dealt with by liberal apologetics. I ultimately felt unsatisfied with this aspect. The author does write in the afterword that many of the questions dealt with in the story may be considered borderline blasphemous in the religious community, and I'm led to believe that the author herself is religious which may explain some of the reluctance.

The afterword that the author includes details her research and some of her choices in writing the story, and I'm grateful for it. There were many points in the book where I wondered why the author made the choices she did and it's very refreshing to have some answers. I do have one nitpick though: while the author acknowledges the two differing accounts of creation in Genesis, there is no inclusion of Lilith in either the narrative or the afterword. While I personally think the inclusion of this rabbinical myth would have been a good source of conflict in the story, it has probably already been done. Ultimately, the choice is the author's anyway.

Eve provides a good mix of history, myth, and legend along with a good exploration of humanity and feminity. Eve also has its rough spots, but I'm willing to let it slide for an author's first novel. Four out of five stars.

Friday, July 24, 2009

Book Review: Inferno

Warning: May Contain Spoilers.

(Note: I am using the Signature Press Editions version of The Divine Comedy by World Publications Group, copyright 2007.)

The version of Inferno found in the Signature Press Editions printing of The Divine Comedy uses the translation by Henry Francis Cary, which dates to 1805. Henry Francis Cary's translation differs quite a bit from the original form that Dante Alighieri employed. First and foremost, something is bound to be lost in the translation from Italian to English; and this is unavoidable. The biggest problem I have with this translation is that it abandoned the form that Dante Alighieri employed in favour of Iambic Pentameter, a form much more suited to the English language. This may not seem like much of an issue but the form that Dante employed, terza rima, was created by the author for the purpose of writing this epic.

The illustrations by Gustave Dore featured throughout the book are exquisitely detailed and can serve to aid visualizing the scenes or provide a brief refuge from the dense prose if you have difficulty.

One other critique of the book itself. It lacks footnotes and this makes it difficult for the lay-reader to appreciate the dearth of allusions and references in the book. There is only one footnote to be found in Inferno, and its purpose is to clarify the pronunciation of a word so that it fits the rhyme scheme. The language is antiquated and conversations are sometimes hard to follow. If you struggled with Shakespeare's works, you will surely struggle with Dante's.

Inferno
is a classic work much referenced in our own times, as well as being an ambitious and creative work for its own time (the fourteenth century) and that should earn it points alone. However, I cannot imagine that the literary standards of the same time period were very high as compared to now, and this shows. Dante frequently writes of his fear, and exalts Heaven. On several occasions he states that he will not describe the horrors that he observes to the reader, presumably because he does not wish to recall them. I think this is an excuse for lazy writing. Further, Dante faints twice during his journey through Hell. Understandable, but the author doesn't make himself out to be a convincing hero, if he can be called that.

Inferno reads at times like propaganda. Dante places his political enemies, bishops, monks, and even a former Pope in Hell. However there is also a sympathetic side, or so it would appear. Dante places Saladin with the virtuous pagans, and the prophet Mohammad and Ali with the schismatics and sowers of discord, not blasphemers. (Although it should be noted that the blasphemers are punished in the seventh circle of Hell, the schismatics in the eighth.)

For all its apparent faults, I must still recommend Inferno and The Divine Comedy simply for its influence and historical value.

Three out of five stars.

Monday, June 22, 2009

Constant Novelty

xkcd posted a comic last week that I want to write about. Specifically, I want to talk about the first line. "Constant novelty saps my initiative."

You've probably noticed that I don't update as often as I would like or as often as I have promised. When I get home from work, I usually turn the computer on and check my E-mail, several blogs and a fair portion of webcomics. I have tried to blame this on OCD before-after all, it is a routine and has some of the characteristics of a ritual. On the other hand, I have a hard time believing it's abnormal behaviour.

Checking the same websites several times an evening for updates does strike me as a bit odd. Admitted, some websites have fixed update schedules, and who wouldn't want to fall behind in our modern fast-paced world?

I don't think that I have an Internet addiction. I don't spend an excessive amount of time on the Internet, and I have gone long periods without any use of a computer at all. If it is OCD, I don't quite get it. What exactly am I obsessing over? And why exactly do I feel compelled to alleviate this obsession? What even am I compelled to do, exactly? I find it more likely that the Internet just offers too great a potential for distraction.

It's easy to go to a favorite website and a find a link to something new and interesting. Then you find another link, and another, and the cascade begins. It is simply too easy to fall into the trap of constant novelty.

I wonder if without the constant novelty, would I be better off? Would I have written that novel by now? Would I have performed better in school? Would I be blogging more? (On the Internet!) Or would my life be less for the enrichment and new ways of thinking that the Internet has exposed me to?

[I'm going to end this here or I'm going to start rambling. I've already had to police myself.]

Updates:

The Digital Cuttlefish is posting again, so I've returned his link to the sidebar.

I've also added a new poll. Look for the review of Inferno next.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Bonk!

If the title makes no sense to you, watch this. If it still doesn't make sense, well, it wasn't intended to address the issue anyway.

I've started reading Inferno. The cantos are fairly short, and I should have the book done fairly soon. I'm hoping to have the review up in a week's time. Eve: A Novel of the First Woman and Wicked were the runners-up, so those will appear in the poll for the next review.

I'm not going to comment on the Prop. 8 ruling in California other than to echo the sentiments of the Pharynguloid hordes. The problem is not with California's supreme court, but California law and the members of the electorate that voted for the amendment in the first place.

Work on the C.O.F. charter is somewhat slow, mostly due to my own laziness. I want the meaning of the articles to be clear, but pen and paper doesn't lend itself well to frequent editing and revising. I think I'll have a far easier time once I import it into an electronic format.

While I'm on the subject, I'd like to plug the following column by Greta Christina, and this follow-up interview as well. To me, it sums up much of what I'd been trying to express but couldn't elucidate. It also represents some of what I hope for in C.O.F. as a philosophical 'movement' - not simply a club created between friends.

I got my course registration package from the college this week but I can't register for any courses until June tenth. I'm not disappointed, I'm just eager to start.

I think I may go downtown yet again this Saturday. I found awesome and win at the comic shop, and I can't wait to share it. I want to keep mum on exactly what it is until Saturday evening though to maintain the suspense.

It's been said before by other people, but it's worth repeating. Thursdays and Saturdays have become the highlights of my week. I can't wait to get together tomorrow and I think I'll bring Dirty Minds too. Also Storyteller, you were right. The peach cider is very good.

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Mid-May Update

Please go vote on the new poll! I'd like to have even more responses than last time.

It's funny how you can have something in mind to write, but as soon as you sit down it evaporates. That is happening to me now.

Regarding the recent B.C. election, I can't say that I'm particularly pleased with the results. I can't say that I'm surprised either. With the current global economic recession, it was unlikely that voters would be willing to rock the boat. B.C. has certainly experienced an economic boom over the last few years which the Liberal party was quick to capitalize on. Occasionally voters will vote against their own economic interests, but voters in B.C. seemed smart enough to do otherwise. For all their faults (closed hospitals and schools, tree farm license sell-offs, ballooning Olympic costs, high poverty and homelessness) the B.C. Liberals appear to have been good for B.C.'s economy.

I think that the NDP made some critical mistakes in their election strategy. The first of which was raising minimum wage to ten dollars. I strongly doubt business owners would support that initiative given the current fears about the economy. The NDP also campaigned against the Carbon Tax, which I think a fair percentage of British Columbians view as a progressive move.

The push for the Single Transferable Vote failed spectacularly. I saw many pro-STV campaigners in Victoria, but very few anti-STV campaigners. The No on STV campaign seemed to devote a fair amount of their efforts on television ads. I found the claim that votes would be divided into fractions and that the voter would not know where their vote went to be misleading. The disintegrating ballot that accompanied this statement was clearly intended to invoke an emotional response in the viewer. Overall, I think the No on STV crowd ran a slick and effective, if underhanded, campaign. The Yes on STV crowd didn't appear to make as much use of electronic media as their opponents, to their own detriment. The failure of the referendum in B.C. will probably mean that initiatives for electoral reform will not be seen in Canada for some time.

I'm clearly becoming more of a cynic as far as politics is concerned. I've come to the conclusion that no matter what happens, you lose.

Friday, May 08, 2009

TMI Tuesday #185

I meant to post this Tuesday, but I ended up going out for coffee with a few friends and knocking a painting off of a wall. I'll have to tell you the story sometime.

1. Have you ever bought a membership to a porn site? If yes, what is the most recent one and did you like it?
I have never purchased a membership for a porn site. I can think of a few where I would buy one though. DOMAI is probably chief among them.

2. Would you rather watch an erotic/porn movie, read a story, or listen to an audio? Why?
All three have their selling points. Men are more likely to be aroused by something visual, so that's one for films. Stories allow the imagination to be used to great effect, whether it's creating the perfect scenario or the perfect partner. So that's one for stories. Audio provides something tangible while allowing the imagination to be used (and I find certain sounds to be erotic or alluring) so that's one for audio. Of course, 90% of anything is sh!t.
I would have to say I would prefer video (for obvious reasons) and you can just close your eyes if you want audio only anyway. Stories are a close second. I think a lot of it has to do with what mood I'm in. If I was aroused, I'd probably go for the video. If I was aroused and romantic, I'd go for the story.

3. If you have a significant other what do you do for each other to get in the mood? If you don't, what could a future potential long term partner do to get you in the mood?
I'm honestly not sure. I think it varies from person to person and relationship to relationship. A might find something sexy when B does it, but not when C does it in a relationship a year later.

4. When it comes to sex, how much do you talk about it with others? How comfortable are you talking about sex?
Sex and sexuality is a common topic among my peer group. I don't talk about sex at all with family members and occasionally anonymously. The comfort level has a lot to do with who I'm talking to and how old they are. That said, I know I shouldn't be uncomfortable or embarrassed talking about sex with anyone. I just perceive social conditioning (etiquette, taboos, etc.) to be quite strong and that has a subconscious effect on me.

5. What are the last 5 things you searched for on Google (or another search engine)?
I can only give you the last two: 'epanaphora' and 'Woodstock lyrics.'

Bonus: Have you ever had a fantasy that you were ashamed of?

I can't think of anything scandalous. Just two obvious ones that I think most people have: classmates and the attractive girl next door. Of course, this was back when I thought being ashamed of sexual fantasies was in vogue.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

I Get Free Advertising

Thanks to one of Blogger's widgets (or honest charity, I can't be sure)I am hyper linked at the home of that most gracious of cephalopod wordsmiths, The Digital Cuttlefish. Unfortunately, the good poet's blog is dormant. I still highly encourage my readers to pop on over and browse through his (or her?) collection of witty verse. Buy a copy of their book if you feel so inclined, I'm sure he (or she) will appreciate it in these tough times.

I suppose if I'm going to be getting more traffic (unlikely) I should do some more work and post more thoughtful entries more often (even less likely.) So please take the time to move your cursor over to the right and cast a vote. Hopefully, it will give me more focus and a better idea of what my readers like and/or desire.

I'm not going to participate in TMI Tuesday this week, and I haven't participated in it the last two weeks. The questions that were posted were either not applicable to me, or ones that I didn't find particularly interested in answering. Not to mention that most of them weren't very TMI. I wonder if maybe the more TMI questions they had were all used up in the first hundred or so installments. Maybe I'll have to suggest a few to the editors.

On a completely unrelated note, my hair is getting to the length where I would normally get a haircut. I don't want one. I've never had my hair fairly long, and I want to try it. I might get a trim here or there to neaten it up or keep it out of my eyes or ears, but I don't want one of these either. (Sorry, ichthyology joke.)

I also need to start writing some poetry for Storyteller's charity drive. Maybe I'll read some of the works of Sappho first, for some inspiration. (Now isn't that odd!)

Friday, April 10, 2009

Things I Hate #1: Price Tags

I was originally going to start this series by ranting about plastic, but I bought some books a while ago and that caused me to re-direct my ire.

I hate price tags.

Particularly on books. Especially on books. They're difficult to peel off, and sometimes they tear. Even if they don't tear they leave behind a nasty glue residue that's a pain to remove. Sometimes they leave blemishes on the cover. It doesn't matter whether it's a softcover book or a hardcover book.

Why can't book merchants just scan the UPC on the book cover, or use the recommended price printed on the dust jacket? Why can't they enter the USBN-10 or USBN-13 into their computers at the checkout to get the price? Or even the author, publisher, or title? It's not exactly outside the means of the larger book selling companies, like Chapters-Indigo or Waterstone's.

Price tags frustrate me.

TMI Tuesday #181

1. Have you ever had a sexual experience with the opposite sex?
No.

2. When you see someone you like, how do you act, how do you get their attention?
It depends on the person and how I relate to them. Most of the time I get someone's attention by saying 'hello.'

3. Dominate or dominated, which do you prefer?
I'll take the latter over the former. I wouldn't feel comfortable in the position of a dominant. I prefer my partners to be equals.

4. Would you/ Have you ever had a threesome?
I would, but I never have.

5. When was the last time you had sex?
I've never had sex.

6. Sex on the first date...good or bad?
That would depend on the specifics. I'm not going to say it's good or bad...I don't know.

7. Do you have any random or out of the ordinary turn ons?
I can think of quite a few things that could be considered turn-ons, or enhance the sensuality of a sexual experience for me. Long hair, glasses, natural bodies, being out-of-doors, tattoos, fur, spanking(?), red hair, brown hair, expressiveness, "pegging," smaller breasts (I find rather large ones a turn-off), and let's say autogynephilia too.

8. What attributes attract you to a potential partner?
I think intelligence, open-mindedness, and enthusiasm are the important ones. I especially like women that will step out of conventional gender roles and make the first move.

TMI Tuesday #180

1. Have you ever sent or received a sext message?
No. I don't have a cell phone.

2. Have you ever made or received a booty call?
No.

3. Have you ever added or edited a word/entry to Wikipedia or Urban Dictionary or any other online reference?
No.

4. At what age did you have your first consensual sexual experience?

Not applicable.

5. What has been the greatest age difference between you a consensual sexual partner?
Not applicable.

Bonus: Why do you blog?

I think I blog for a lot of reasons. It's something to do. It's a way to express myself pseudo-anonymously without costing anything. It allows me to develop my ideas and practice my writing skills. Of course, there's peer pressure there too. Lots of other people where starting to blog, or had already started, when I did.

TMI Tuesday #179

1. Ever Googled a date, a potential date or an ex?
Nope.

2. Do you gossip?
I guess. Most people do to some extent.

3. How many people do you completely trust?
I can think of several people I trust, but only a few I completely trust. At least one person, for sure.

4. Have you ever had sex in a car?
No. It's on the to-do list.*

5. What is your best flirting technique: innuendo, telling a dirty joke, talking about sex life, or physical contact?
I don't know. I'm not a flirty person.

Bonus: How many times is the most you have ever had sex in a 24 hour period?
For sex, none. Does masturbation count?**

* I meant that as a joke, so only take it semi-seriously.
** You're not finding that number out.

TMI Tuesday #178

1. Don't tell us what it is, but do you have a sexual secret you have never told anyone?
Of course I do.

2. Do you have a nonsexual secret you have never told anyone?
Probably, but I can't think of it.

3. Did you ever tell someone a secret only to have them spill it? What were the repercussions?
I can't recall an incident like that. It's probably happened to me at one point, it seems to happen to lots of people.

4. Did you ever spill a secret someone told you? What were the repercussions?

See my previous answer.

5. Tell us a secret someone told you, however long ago, that you've never told. (You can disguise names or details.)
If I could remember any secrets, I would tell you one.

TMI Tuesday #177

1. Are you pro-marriage? Why or why not?
That would depend on how you define pro-marriage, but generally no. I think marriage is a social institution that government has no business dealing with in the first place. Government gives tax breaks and benefits to those who are married over those that aren't. The same goes for people that have children versus those that don't. Arguably these two things are in the government's interest, because young people stimulate the economy by spending money and providing labour. Even given that, I view it as the government discriminating against those who elect not to get married or have children.
If you define pro-marriage as "heterosexuals only" I'm even more against it because it's obviously discriminatory.

2. Have you ever invented or thought you invented a sexual position?
Not that I'm aware of. But if anyone has invented one, someone else has probably already discovered it first.

3. Do you like to be tied up? Always or sometimes?

I haven't tried that. I'll say yes-sometimes.

4. Do you consider online cybering adultery?

It would depend on the individuals involved in the relationship and the type of relationship they have. At this point in my life my answer would be no.

5. Do you prefer masturbation over real sex?
God, I hope not.

6. Do you want sex more times a day than your partner?
Not applicable to me.

7. Do you get offended when your partner openly flirts with others or are you okay with it?
This isn't applicable to me either. I would say that this answer is also dependent on the individuals in the relationship and the type of relationship they're in.

8. Do you think you're flirty by nature?
I think I'm too serious and introverted to be flirty by nature.

TMI Tuesday #176

1. Is there a sexual act/position/practice that you were sure in advance you would hate (or never try) and then discovered to your surprise you loved?
Nothing comes immediately to mind. Mind you, I haven't experimented a whole lot. My opportunities have been somewhat limited.

2. Is there a sexual act/position/practice that proved a lot less interesting in practice than you thought it would be beforehand?
Not yet. See my previous answer.

3. How do you let your significant other know you're in the mood? How do you let a new person in your life know?
The first question isn't applicable to me; and the second I'm not sure I have an answer for.

4. How does your significant other let you know he/she is in the mood?
Not applicable to me.

5. Is there one that got away - a sexual opportunity you didn't realize was one at the time, or weren't ready for and regret missing ever since?
Not a sexual opportunity. I can think of one opportunity-not a sexual one-that got away, but I couldn't have acted on it anyway. I probably would have been too young to appreciate it as I would now anyway.

TMI Tuesday #175

1. What do find is the most exciting part of a new sexual encounter?
I think most women would say that the most exciting part of a sexual encounter is the foreplay. (Let's face it-orgasm doesn't always happen, but when it does it's amazing, albeit brief.) I'm tempted to agree. Foreplay sets the tone for everything that follows, and builds the tension that is oh-so-important.

2. Do you have "a most exciting part of a sexual encounter" with a usual partner?
Not applicable to me at the moment.

3. How open and honest are you about your life with someone you just met?

It takes me a long time to build trust. I wouldn't be as open and honest in real life with someone I just met, compared to writing on here or with one of my friends.

4. How open and honest are you about your life with someone you work with?
Generally speaking, not very. I guess I haven't found that perfect job yet.

5. How open and honest are you about your life with a casual acquaintance who lives in your neighborhood (or the parent of your child's friend or...)?
Once again, not very. As I said, it takes me a while to build trust in a person.

Bonus: Define a "normal" as in "normal relationship" or "normal sex life".

I refuse to do that because there is no such thing as 'normal' when it comes to sexuality. Even suggesting an average would be laughable.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

TMI Tuesday #174

1. What is your favorite charity? Do you you give your time or just money to that charity?
If I had to pick, it would be the International Wolf Centre. To date, they haven't been the beneficiary of my money or my time. I'm hoping that will change. I just really like wolves.

2. Describe your bed. What side do you sleep on?
It's a twin size bed with a blue mattress cover. I sleep with on my side with my pillows in a herringbone pattern with the darker one under my head. That way, I don't see any hair that's fallen out of my scalp when I wake up in the morning. If my bed was alongside a wall, I'd sleep facing it.

3. How important is a partners kissing ability?
It depends on the couple and whether you like kissing or not. For me, I'm not sure.

4. Have you ever "taken advantage" of a person under the influence of alcohol? Have you ever been "taken advantage" of while under the influence of alcohol?
No and no. Also, that's statutory rape.

5. Ever tried to replay the famous scene from From Here to Eternity? How was it?
Nope.

Bonus: What kind of birth control do you use?
Not applicable to me. (Alternate answer: virginity.)

TMI Tuesday #173

1. What do you think is the un-sexiest part of the body?
I mostly agree with Storyteller, Zepplinphan, et al on this one but I want to expand on it a bit. Human genitalia, male and female, can be beautiful. I think a lot of it has to do with conditioning. Considering how much of sex and the human body has been considered taboo over history, I think that the male penis and female vulva have become symbols for sex and that is why we associate our desires with them. There's also a lot of biology behind that too. However we're still conditioned enough to feel ashamed about it or not admit our true thoughts on the matter fully. I came to the conclusion quite a while ago (philosophically speaking) that there is nothing about anything that makes it inherently attractive or unattractive.

2. Toilet paper: over, under, or what the hell are you talking about?

Over. It's an OCD thing.

3. Have you ever called in sick to stay in bed with a sexual partner?
No. That sounds really blissful though.

4. Did your parents have a "birds & bees" talk with you? If so, at what age?

Thankfully, no. I somehow managed to change the subject before things got too awkward. Every time. I think the people hired by the school board for that sort of thing are more qualified anyway.

5. What is one thing someone could do to you to rock your world?
I have no idea. Maybe if I opened my door one day and one of my friends played an awesome rock solo on guitar complete with light effects and smoke machines. I think that would be sweet.

Bonus: What does sex mean to you?
As far as I can think of it, sex is probably the closest thing to a religious experience I can imagine. Something sacred. [NSFW] It is the penultimate joining of two persons, physically and emotionally. (No The Da Vinci Code crap, please.) Ideally it is the recognition of one's own needs and desires and another's needs and desires fulfilled with passion and emotion. Of course, sometimes sex is just that-sex.

Monday, February 23, 2009

TMI Tuesday #172

1. When you sleep with someone, how much or how little contact do you like to have?

I'm going to assume you literally mean sleeping. It depends on how I'm feeling. Normally, I don't like being touched very much or in certain ways. If it's a cold night or I'm feeling depressed though, it's nice to have someone to cuddle up to. It's comforting and reassuring. I'm under the impression that I move around a lot when I'm sleeping, so maybe the better question is "How much or how little contact do others like to have with me when I'm sleeping?"

2. What do you think is an appropriate amount of time for a divorced parent to date before introducing the kids to the new 'special' person in their life?

At first I interpreted this as "What do you think is an appropriate amount of time for a divorced parent to wait before introducing the kids to the new 'special' person in their life?"

For dating, I don't think it matters a whole lot. It's easier to avoid awkward questions with younger children and adult children would probably understand. It's the 8-18 crowd that might have some difficulty.

As for my interpretation, I would wait six months or so before introducing a steady S/O to younger children.

3. Which ONE do you wish you had more of in bed... romance, experimentation or foreplay?

[Scene: An oddly BDSM-themed prison courtyard with a prisoner, a warden, and two scantily clad guards. The prisoner is manacled to a wall.]

Warden: "Do you have any last words?"

Prisoner: "Yes. All three."

Guards: [They shoot the Prisoner.]

Prisoner: [Le petit mort]

If I had to pick ONE, I'd say experimentation because that covers all three.

4. What do you thinks makes a kiss great?

I haven't kissed a whole lot by anyone's standard, so I'll say passion. If I wanted passionless kisses, I'd go down to the fish market. (Har, har, cold fish!)

5. Describe your sex life in two words.

"Not there."

(Double interpretation FTW!)

Bonus (as in optional): Do you remember a time when you were having sex that you smile or even laugh about now? Do tell....

Not applicable, so no.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

25 Things

Bryi tagged me for the '25 Things' meme, so here goes:

#1: I was born ten weeks prematurely via a Caesarian section.

#2: I have a lump on my scalp from where an I.V. was inserted when I was a newborn.

#3: I have a something of a love/hate relationship with my current job.

#4: When I retire (hopefully no later than 55) I'd like to have a fair sized property that I could put a pottery shed on or use to raise alpacas or bees.

#5: If I look at my hands or feet for a period of time, it makes me feel old.

#6: I would like to have at least a Master's degree.

#7: One of my life goals is to be labeled eccentric.

#8: I don't put a lot of emphasis on physical appearance, but I like to dress up occasionally.

#9: I have a mild hoarding complex. I have a hard time throwing anything out.

#10: I collect a lot of things. Bottles, semi-precious gems, buttons, books, etc.

#11: I will need a room to house a few bookcases when I move out.

#12: I've done a few things that may or may not come back to haunt me.

#13: I've done a few things that may surprise some people. (Refer to #12.)

#14: I'd like to get a tattoo or a few, at some point.

#15: I've been hit by a car.

#16: I'd probably have an art collection if I was a millionaire.

#17: I'm ashamed to admit I haven't read a lot of the classics.

#18: I haven't seen a lot of classic movies either.

#19: I like animals.

#20: I'd like to be a writer. I'd like to be a lot of other things too, actually.

#21: I own a guitar, but I can't play it...yet.

#22: I like to have a drink everyday and somehow this makes me wonder if I'm an alcoholic.

#23: I can't remember the name of my first friend. I think it started with a B.

#24: I am left-brained.

#25: One of these responses is a lie.

Saturday, January 31, 2009

Thoughts From 1 A.M.

I was getting ready for bed at about one o'clock on Saturday morning. I was standing in the bathroom looking in the mirror and mentally altering my appearance. I had just had a haircut at five o'clock on Friday, and this was my first chance to take a really good look at it.

I didn't like it. I missed having longer hair; particularly at the back of my neck. It made me feel vulnerable. It also made me look...butch. First, I imagined myself without the facial hair. Then I added breasts. B cups first, then C cups. The kind where the nipples point out away from the centre of the chest a bit. I was oddly pleased and amused with the results of my thought experiment. Maybe it's because I was born and raised in British Columbia, but I'm just a B- and C-type of person.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

TMI Tuesday Power Hour

Can I complete five TMI Tuesdays in one hour?

TMI Tuesday #166 - Merry Christmas!


1. What present do you hope ends up under your tree?

I wanted a Chapters iRewards membership...and I got it!

2. What present are you most psyched about giving?


I got a friend of mine some inflatable packaging from work as a sort of gag gift. I'm not sure if she's popped it yet.

3. Do you prefer to give or receive?

I'll say give. (You're more likely to receive something if you give something first. ;) )

4. What is your favorite part of a sexual partner's body?

Ignoring the naughty bits...the back, the sides of the neck, and the ridges at the top of the pelvis. Oh, and the sides of the ribcage. But please, no anorexic models.

5. What is the favorite part of your body - the one you hope a sexual partner will find or pay the most attention to?

I'm still a bit uncomfortable about my body...my 'sex esteem' if you will. Although that's improved in the last few years. I think the back of my neck is a fairly erogenous zone. Especially the knobs on my vertebrae.

Bonus: What Christmas wishes would you grant to whom? I don't really know what any of my friends' or family members' Christmas wishes were. I guess I'll have to wait until next year.

TMI Tuesday #167 - Happy New Year!

1. Last week was "The Most Wonderful time of the Year", but what are your favorite 2008 memories?

My favorite memories involve my friends. I enjoy myself the most when I'm around them.

2. What is the best thing you learned in 2008?

I'm not entirely sure. Maybe having the personal experience of being a wage slave is the most significant.

3. On a scale of 1-10, how good was your 2008?

I'm going to say an eight. It wasn't amazing, but I graduated and got a decent job. I also grew closer to my friends, and made a few new ones.

4. What is your wish for 2009? What is your wish for someone else for 2009?

I don't want the Republicans in the U.S. or the Conservatives (and the lukewarm Liberals, for that matter) here in Canada to screw things up anymore than they already are. I think most of us can agree on that.

5. Where was the first place you ever passionately kissed?

I'll tell you when I find out. :(

Bonus:Do you make New Year's resolutions? What is/are your's for 2009?

In 2008, my New Year's Resolution was to stop making New Year's resolutions.

TMI Tuesday #168 - Would You Rather...

1. Would you rather be stranded on an island alone or with someone you dislike/don't get along with?

I think I'd rather be stranded with someone I don't get along with. Best case scenario: We learn to tolerate each other. Worst case scenario: One of us becomes a cannibal.

2. Would you rather accidentally walk in on your parents having sex or have them walk in on you?

Seriously? I'll take the latter over the former.

3. Would you rather be snapped by paparazzi during a nipple slip or while exiting a car without any underwear?
(Guys, consider similar circumstances.)


I think I'll take the former this time.

4. Would you rather not have sex for two years or not be able to use the Internet for two years?

I've gotten this far without sex just fine, so I'll say the former.

5. Would you rather find true love or 1 million dollars?

Without getting into a philosophical debate about the existence of true love, I'll say true love.

Bonus: If you had to choose *one* sexual position for the rest of your life, what would it be? Why?

I can't think of any conceivable circumstance where you'd be forced to chose one sexual position for the rest of your life. (That would be really boring.) Anyway, I'm going to go with the Lotus because it's really intimate.

TMI Tuesday #169 - Back to TMI Basics

1. On a scale of 1-10, how satisfied are you with your sex life?

I'll say a five. I'd like a sex life, but I've been able to survive this long.

2. If someone shoves you up against a wall while kissing you, your reaction is?

"WTF? ... This is hot..."

3. What is the most romantic thing anyone has ever done or said to you?

I'm not sure. I haven't had a romance, so to speak.

4. Where is the most unusual place you have ever had sex?

Not applicable to me.

5. How do you liked to be kissed?

Softly, I think.

Bonus: Most embarrassing sexual moment?

Not applicable either.

TMI Tuesday #170

1. Have you ever dated/married purely for money?


No, and I don't particularly plan on it.

2. What is your type?

I'm going to answer this in a different way. My Myers-Briggs is INTP, although the last two have been F's and J's in the past. I think I'd be compatible with other IN-- types.

3. What is the best sex game you have ever played?

I've never played a sex game. I've played games with sexual questions, but not a sex game.

4. Have you ever given or received an orgasm from a person whose last name you did not know?

No I haven't.

5. Have you ever masturbated in front of a sexual partner?

'No I haven't' for this one too.

Bonus: At what age do you think men and women reach their sexual peak? Do you think you have hit yours yet?

I think men hit their sexual peak between 17-25. Women around 25-32. I imagine I'm in mine right now. (Don't let it go to waste girls! [And maybe some guys.])